Why is forgiveness so important?
Do I have it in me to forgive?
They don’t deserve my forgiveness!
Have these questions ever come across your mind? If you are like most, they have.
Yesterday, I had the pleasure of meeting an awesome woman with a powerful testimony. We had a one on one No More Bandages! session about her struggle to forgive. It was a power conversation that God orchestrated.
We know that forgiveness is never easy and it often appears as something so impossible to accomplish. The Bible says, “And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.” (Mark 11:25). We must forgive in order to be forgiven. We come to God on a daily basis asking for forgiveness, but it’s much harder to forgive those who have hurt us. Some have been hurt so deep that it feels as though there is no coming back from it.
When you are hurt by someone you may wonder why they did what they did to you. Or you may want them to understand how bad they hurt you. Others may desire vengeance.
One thing I’ve realized is, that person may never care or even acknowledge what they did to you. That’s a tough fact, but it’s true. However, forgiveness is not about them, it’s about you. Forgiveness releases you from the pain and suffering of those tragic events.
Sometimes we think if we forgive then we are saying what they did was okay. But really what it says is, you hurt me but I am not going to give this thing any more power or control over me. Remember, forgiveness doesn’t happen overnight. It is a process and it starts with a desire to forgive. Once you have that desire, God can take care of the rest.
If you are struggling with forgiveness today, that’s okay. If you have been struggling for 5, 10, or even 20 years, that’s okay too. Just continue to do all you can to find forgiveness because it’s important to forgive, if nothing else, for your own sanity. Go to God and tell him you have a desire to forgive. Tell him you don’t know how to forgive but you want to. That basic desire alone will start the process in you. God knows your heart and he also knows the hurt. Allow him to get inside to work on your healing. In the meantime, do your part as well. Take some time to be selfish so you can work on you. If you have to separate yourself from this person for a season then do so. If you need to find a counselor so you can talk, do it today. Do whatever you have to do to heal completely.
Trust me, one day you will wake up and see that it’s all behind you and you are free. It’s a long road ahead but God can do anything if you let him.
If it’s forgiveness or other areas you are struggling with, join us at No More Bandages! women’s ministry. We meet the first Wednesday of each month, 6-7pm, Refuge Temple Church, 555 Moler St, Columbus, Oh 43207
We also have “Breakfast Chat” on the first Saturday of the month, 10-11:30 am, Franklinton Library, 1061 W. Town Street, Columbus, Oh 43222. Bring your breakfast with you and let’s talk about today’s issues that women are facing.